World Peace Achieved! Everyone Gets a Bazooka

In a desperate attempt to achieve world peace, world leaders have collectively decided it’d be best if everyone was given a bazooka.

The world collectively cheered as everyone unwrapped their brand new man-portable recoiless anti-tank rocket launcher. Yes, EVERYONE. Store owners, lumberjacks, each and every family member - every single person you can imagine.

And you’re required to bring it everywhere, which poses a logistical nightmare to most – in some countries you’ll get fined for not having it with you at all times.

And while this also poses some serious ethical questions, SOME world leaders aren’t terribly concerned about this right now.

“Right now it’s a bit of a trial period – hopefully, not too many accidents!” said one world leader of a Western country that likes war a lot and wishes to remain anonymous. “Ethics, schmethics!”

The cost of said bazookas for the world came to a whopping “gazillion majillion fafillion” dollars, as stated by most of the accounting teams who are managing this particular expenditure for their respective countries. They, among other groups, are strongly against this initiative.

“I am not saying it isn’t nice to get a free bazooka, but what about food and clean water and infrastructure and literally everything else for the ones who need it most?!” asked one accountant of Western country that likes war a lot.

We will bring you the latest as we continue to break this story and in the meantime, you can get yourself a bazooka cozy in assorted colors from Amazon. Express your personal style and keep that weapon cozy!