Women Cleans Out Handbag; Finds Actual Hand

During a recent cleanout of her handbag, Mariah J. found an actual human hand.

“Hmm, not sure how it got in there!” she said amidst a scatter of receipts and gum wrappers…and the HAND.

She recalls the last time cleaning out her handbag was 2010 after an Imagine Dragons concert. Mariah is not certain where THE GODDAMN HAND came from. It could be a number of places.

“I mean, I did go to a hospital to see a friend when she had her baby in 2019, but I didn’t go to the morgue or anything when I was there, haha!” exclaims Mariah J.

Random hands showing up in women’s purses are actually more common than one would think (ew!) It’s a phenomenon with women who have especially large, oversized handbags – at least 1 out of 200 women experience this.

Professor Alice Fritz who studies consumer behavior from GeeWhiz University describes it as a “problem of plenty.”

“The psychology behind it is that this bag can literally carry everything and it is so big you just let it collect things. Happens all the time – it’s happened since the beginning of time,” explains Fritz. “But the HAND THING…yeah, that’s kinda gross. But it happens!”

Fulton neither confirms nor denies if she has found a hand in her bag in the past.

Among the items found in Mariah J.’s bag:

- Her Tamagachi from middle school

- A swimsuit from a swim party in 2013 (it was still damp)

- 35 fortunes from a fortune cookie

- 56 takeout menus from THE SAME Chinese restaurant where said fortune cookies are from

- A BUNCH of bunched up receipts

- A big ball of wired headphones (estimated 8 headphones total)

- 5 lost credits cards

- At least 2 inches of crumbs from snacks

- Unwrapped and warm gum circa 2016-2018

She doesn’t regret the past 13 years but does regret not cleaning out her bag at least once in a while.

“I mean, yeah, just don’t put everything in your bag. Maybe more attention to detail would be good…” Mariah J. said as she beelined for the dish of peppermints she saw at the cash register at the Chinese restaurant (yes, the same restaurant that the menus and the fortunes are from) and continues to grab a handful and throw them in her handbag…with a giant smile on her face.